“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” – Eugene Ionesco
We must become who we are . . .
The acorn must grow into an oak. This trajectory is in its very DNA. The acorn can’t grow into an elm tree or a maple tree. It must grow into an oak tree.
We also come into the world with a personality path that must unfold throughout our lives. This is encoded in the biological and psychological structure of our being.
Individuation is a natural process that is a psychological necessity.
Plato’s acorn theory suggests that our lives are shaped by an innate seed of destiny within us, much like an acorn must grow into an oak tree. We have a unique potential and purpose that unfolds throughout our lives.
Symbolically, the acorn represents the soul’s journey, attracting events and experiences necessary for its realization. Often, this journey involves moments of fate, synchronicity, and challenges that push us to reflect on our existence and grow into our true selves.
We must become our authentic selves through the process of soul-making.
Individuation implies becoming one’s own self (self-realization) as distinct from the identification with the collective values and norms.
However, the complete realization of individuation, particularly for human beings, is not automatic; it requires conscious development and is described as a difficult, lifelong task.
What happens if we don’t follow the Soul’s call
C. G. Jung observed what he called “the failure to individuate” in over 55 years of working with clients. He warned that it is not merely a lack of personal growth, but refusing the call to individuate has potentially severe psychological consequences.
It happens when the natural, necessary process of self-realization is artificially checked, resisted, or misdirected. That is, when the ego is afraid of growth, stuck in old ways of being, and despite repeated and increasingly noisy calls from the self, runs away from what is being asked of it.
At its worst, the avoidance of being curious about what is being asked of us can result in disassociation, fragmentation, severe addiction, and disease.
We get stuck in the victim and disempowering questions.
The Role of Consciousness and Asking the Right Questions
Jung said that consciousness must be developed, as it is the “flower” of the human individuation process. This is the core psychospiritual task: tear off the many veils of illusion covering the true self. To work through all of our traumas and our conditioning to find our authentic and genuine self.
The final goal is to be complete—not perfect—by accepting oneself without reservation or judgement. The goal of this process is the displacement of the personality center from the limited ego into the comprehensive Self.
How do we do this?
By asking the right questions.
Life speaks to us in tragedy or in unusual ways. That is the nature of life. Our first question is often, “Why me? Why now?”
But that question keeps us circling our pain instead of entering it.
Jung once said, “Life has addressed you with a question.” Soul-making begins when we start asking better questions.
Questions that open us up, lead with curiosity, make our world larger, turn events into experience, and suffering into meaning.
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